There Was Carnage. And I Felt Better.

Some wasps died today, crushed beneath the flat side of a child's garden shovel.  Whacked many, many times - definitely more times than necessary.

Let me be clear:  I am not nature girl.  But I've lived in what might be characterized as "the countryside" for two years now and felt I'd finally made peace with nature in my backyard.  I'd finally achieved a grudging respect and, in many cases, appreciation for the freakishly large insects and spiders there.

UNTIL TODAY WHEN WASPS STUNG MY TODDLER. 

He was climbing on the playset with our babysitter while I spent some time on the computer.  His shrieks were unmistakably of pain and fear - I ran outside and knew immediately what had happened.  He'd never been stung before - neither of my kids had - so I wasn't sure if he'd have an anaphylactic reaction.

I quickly removed the stingers from his wrist and hand (three of them!), washed the area, then applied a compress of wet baking soda topped with crushed ice to his rapidly swelling hand.  After he'd downed a half teaspoon of children's benedryl, I called the doctor to see what else I could do for him, watching carefully for breathing difficulties.  Thankfully, he was okay and back in good spirits in a short time.

That's when I went on the warpath.

I'd knocked down maybe a dozen wasp nests from the playset over the course of the last year.  Recently, twice from the exact same spot within two days.  Sure enough, they were back again.  I set the hose on JET and proceeded to blast the nest out of its groove, stamping and whacking the wasps with the shovel.  There was carnage.  And I felt better.

My First Blog Award!

Many thanks to Jael Custom Designs for giving me my first blog award - it was very nice of her to think of me.  Check out her website - she is a freelance graphic designer, a newspaper professional, a social networker and a mom of four.

 

Here are the rules of the "One Lovely Blog" award:

Accept the award and post it on your blog along with the name of the person who has granted you the award and his or her blog link.  Pass the award on to 15 other blogs that you've newly discovered.  Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award.

Now it is my turn to pass it along, so here are my 15 choices (bloggers: you are all on my website's blog roll, too!):

1. The Suburban Jungle http://thesuburbanjungle.blogspot.com/
2. Mission Mommy http://snipsandsnailsboutique.blogspot.com/
3. Holly Goes Lightly http://www.hollygoeslightly.net/
4. Matthew's Puzzle http://matthewspuzzle.blogspot.com/
5. The Obnoxious SAHM http://theobnoxioussahm.blogspot.com/
6. Six Feet Under  http://sixfeetundersite.blogspot.com/
7. Zen and the Art of Motherhood http://zenandmotherhood.blogspot.com/
8. Musings of a "Cheesed Off Haus Frau" http://cheesedoffhf.blogspot.com/
9. Strawberry Seeds http://www.strawberryseeds.net/
10. Daddy Is Tired http://www.daddyistired.com/ (Ok, not sure he'll post it, but folks, he's great!)
11. King Max cried "Let the Wild Rumpus Begin!" http://kingmaxcried.blogspot.com/
12. Lululu At Home http://www.lululuathome.com/
13. We Have Cupcakes http://wehavecupcakes.blogspot.com/
14. Rylee For Life http://ryleeforlife.blogspot.com/
15. Iva Messy http://www.ivamessy.com/

One of My Favorite Kitchen Items: A Thermometer

What could be greener than making sure that whatever food you prepare is tasty? Tasty food is sure to be eaten, not thrown away as leftovers days later.

I can't really remember where the idea came from - maybe a cooking show. The basic message was this: you can take the guesswork out of preparing any meat or poultry by using a thermometer to cook it only until it is safe to eat. Cooking it beyond this point might only serve to dry it out and ensure that you have leftovers.

Here are the USDA's Recommended Safe Minimum Internal Temperatures:

Steaks and Roasts - 145 degrees F
Fish - 145 degrees F
Ground Beef - 160 degrees F (1 of every 4 hamburgers is brown before it is safe to eat!)
Egg Dishes - 160 degrees F
Chicken Breasts - 165 degrees F
Whole Poultry - 165 degrees F

I went to the grocery store and bought a very cheap stainless steel meat thermometer and immediately tried it out on some boneless chicken breasts. I was astonished at the results and the ease with which I achieved them.

After a few weeks of perfectly cooked pork chops, chicken, pot roast, steak, etc, my husband announced that he thinks I am a very good cook. A few dollars really well spent!

When you buy your own, note that many of them indicate right on the thermometer what "rare", "medium", "well done" temperatures are for various proteins. Keep in mind that these temps - particularly "rare" temps, aren't always high enough to kill the bad stuff. So follow the USDA's guidelines instead.

Daily Photo: Look Inside the Heart

The tiny freckle on my toddler's ear.  It's like a little target that says "kiss me here!"

TechnoMeg: How to Automatically Greet Your New Twitter Followers

Want to be polite and greet your new Twitter followers but don't have the time?  Social Oomph is a free service that will automatically greet them for you, using a message you create yourself.

It also automates a number of other functions.  Check it out.

Daily Photo: Gizzards & Liver

I'm guessing they're not organic.

No More Toxic Cleaners

(originally published 6/29/09, updated 9/25/09)

I finally did it. I rid my home of toxic cleaners. I wish I'd done it a lot sooner.

I was worried about using harsh household cleaners around my small children. I also felt like the products were overkill. The fumes were ridiculous and if I didn't wear gloves, my hands were practically raw afterward!

When I was a child, we used products like Comet, Spic and Span and Joy. Not as harsh as some of today's products, but still not quite green. So I stepped back and looked one generation further. Folks used to clean their homes with much simpler ingredients: baking soda, white vinegar, essential oils. So I decided to use these to make my own household cleaners.

The old fashioned ingredients work well (even in my oven!), leave my house and car clean and fresh, aren't toxic, are easy to make and cost next to nothing.

I bought a bunch of empty spray bottles at Lowes, 3 huge "bulk" jugs of white vinegar, a few "bulk" bottles of hydrogen peroxide and a "bulk" bag of baking soda at Costco, and a small bottle of tea tree oil and a bottle of all-natural liquid dish soap and some lemon essential oil at my grocery store.

Here's what I use now...

1. Glass/window cleaner: 20 oz water, 8 oz white vinegar, 20 drops lemon oil. I have found that newspaper cleans glass really well - better than paper towels or cloth.

2. All-purpose cleaner (not for marble, but I use it on granite, my wood kitchen table and my stainless steel appliances with equally good results): 10 oz water, 10 oz white vinegar, 7 drops tea tree oil, 4 drops lemon oil. Shake it, spray it on, then wipe it off.

3. Tile floor cleaner: half warm water, half white vinegar. I clean with the 50/50 mixture, then wipe with plain warm water.

4. Hard wood floor cleaner: a bucket of warm water with three drops of lemon oil and three drops of uncomplicated liquid dish soap. I clean with the mixture, then wipe with plain warm water.

5. Marble cleaner - most folks recommend only wiping with water, but I like to clean things. So I fill a spray bottle with warm water and add a few drops of uncomplicated liquid dish soap. Shake, then spray it on. Marble stains easily so I work quickly, rinse the solution off with a very wet cloth and towel dry to avoid hard water marks.

6. When I need more muscle, I have a spray bottle filled simply with white vinegar. I spray it on and let it sit for a few minutes, then wipe. It will clean the inside of the microwave, oven and refrigerator without a ton of scrubbing. In the shower or commode, I spray vinegar or hydrogen peroxide, then apply baking soda if I need to scrub. Let it sit a few minutes, then rub a bit and rinse with water.

7. Hydrogen peroxide is also good when you need deeper cleaning in the kitchen or bathroom - I keep this in a handy spray bottle, too. To properly disinfect, you need to let it sit for a few minutes while it fizzes, then wipe it off.

8. Wood polish: 1 cup of olive oil plus 1/2 cup of lemon juice - I make it fresh each time -rub it in with one cloth, then buff it off with a fresh one.

As a result of this, I no longer use a ton of disposable disinfectant wipes and disposable floor wipes, so I went to Costco and spent a few bucks on a dozen white bar towels, picked up a mop with machine-washable terry cloth covers at my grocery store, and a two-compartment rolling mop bucket at Lowes. Now I not only save money on my cleaning supplies and feel better about the chemical situation in my home, but I also no longer generate as much waste because it is all machine washable.

Win win win!

Time will tell how well these mixtures work for me, but so far so good. I’ll keep you posted.

Update 9/25/09:
Tired of lugging around buckets of clean and vinegar water, I bought a Shark Steam Pocket Mop.  It cleans and kills germs using only hot steam.  I sweep or vacuum first to remove debris, then use the steam mop to remove stuck-on dirt and spots and disinfect.  I bought a few extra pockets and just toss them in the washing machine when I'm done.  I use it on my tile and hardwood floors.  LOVE it.

What, If Any, Dietary Supplements Do You Give Your Kids?

I think we should all endeavor to get whatever vitamins and minerals we need from natural sources in our diet.  To that end, I consistently put healthy, well-balanced meals and snacks in front of my kids.  Without fail, even on birthdays (I know, I'm such a meanie), and they don't get dessert unless they do a decent job with "the good stuff."

But we all know you can't make a small child eat anything.  Despite efforts to hide the vegetables (in tomato sauce, grilled cheese sandwiches, mac and cheese, smoothies, muffins, etc.), they don't always eat everything on their plate, so I know they don't always get everything they need in order to maintain their health.  Last night I even tried to hide baby spinach on my kids' pizza by pureeing and sprinkling it under the cheese.  When my older son asked about it I told him it was "just spices" - but he was too smart for that ploy.

So, I'm a believer in dietary supplements for my kids.  Here is what I give mine:

1. If you've followed this blog since its inception, you know I'm a big proponent of probiotics in our diet.  I've been giving my kids Country Life's Maxi Baby-Dophilus, a powdered probiotic that I put in their morning juice.  
2. I also give them Gummy Vites Multi-Vitamins and Gummy Calciums - these look exactly like gummy bears and my kids love them.
3. Lastly, I recently started giving my kids a liquid vitamin D3 supplement in their morning juice, after reading about how D3 deficiency makes a person more susceptible to swine flu.  In the age of sunscreen (my kids wear it frequently), unless they're getting enough D3 in their diet, they're not getting enough of it.  Since I'm leaning toward opting out of the H1N1 vaccine for my family (given all of the concern about what the vaccine itself might do to harm our health) I want to be sure we're doing what we can to help our bodies combat it.

Do you think I'm missing anything here?  What supplements, if any, do you give your kids?

Why Did God Make Germs?

My five year old has put forth an avalanche of questions in the past year. 

"What does Superman's cape do?" (it looks cool)
"Why do you and Daddy have to be alone sometimes?" (we like each other)
"Why do some animals eat plants and others eat meat?" (they eat what their teeth and stomachs can handle)
"Are you a safe driver?" (of course, but no one else on the road is)
"What's 10 minus 12?"  (-2  - he's fascinated by the notion that zero is not the smallest number)
"What's the biggest number?" (infinity - this thrills him, too)

And most recently, "why did God make germs?" 

I pondered my response, knowing the best answer probably wasn't "so that Mommy could see just how little sleep she could have without cracking up!" or "so that we could see just how many viruses the entire family could catch in the first month you are back at school!"

I paused, then replied, "no one really knows why God does things but I it seems to me that if we didn't get sick we might not appreciate it when we feel well.  Feeling well is a pretty terrific thing, don't you think?"  He did. 

He turned to the toddler and said, "you don't want to get sick do you?" Eyes wide, the toddler shook his head.  "So don't put your finger in your nose!"

That's my boy!
 

How Do These Books Make Their Way Through The Publishers?

We love books.  We have a ton of them.  Whenever relatives ask for suggestions for birthday or Christmas gifts, I ALWAYS recommend books.

My five year old is just starting to read and write simple sentences.  Most days, he brings a phonics story book home from school and reads it to us at bedtime before we read more complex stories to him.  But I proudly digress...

My older child is now at school and I was just reading to the toddler.  I selected an early reader that had been a gift for my older child's recent birthday.  The title?  Little Red Riding Hood.  The picture on the cover is sort of Raggedy-Anne styled, with little circles on Red's cheeks making her look doll-like.  Seemed harmless enough.  I was thinking this would be like Sesame Street's take on the Three Little Pigs, where they're all friends at the end.  So I started reading it to my toddler.

Good thing I always mentally read one sentence ahead, because I was able to imperceptibly edit the following for my very alert two year old:

• On page 17, the wolf ate Grandma in one big bite.  
• On page 24, he ate Red, too.  
• On page 26, a woodcutter took an axe and cut open the wolf's belly and pulled out Grandma and Red.  
• On page 27, Red, Grandma and the woodcutter had tea - outside of Grandma's house, since I'm guessing there was a big mess inside.

The back of the book says, among other things that "First Readers are ideal for... reading alone."  Yeah. I don't think so.  This book is going to the same place where the cute cowboy book that included a graphic scene of branding cows is going - to the dark, dusty shelf at the top of the toy closet.

Good grief.  How do these things make their way through the publishers?

Mom, I Want A Snuggie!

It's become apparent that my five-year-old pays close attention to the advertisements during his daily allowance of TV.  He's informed me that there are diapers that stretch and move with your baby - "shouldn't we have those for my baby brother?"  Half of his birthday wish list was comprised of items "As Seen On TV" such as the Zero Gravity Micro Car and the RC Helicopter Apache.

It's one thing to try to convince kids they want to consume blue yogurt because there's a cool looking kid on a skate board on the container. Or hamburgers with 50 grams of fat to get a $0.05 lead-infused plastic toy that will break in the car on the way home from the fast food restaurant, causing endless tears.  Or collect fifty CARS movie cars, half of which are no longer made so you have to search for them on eBay - not that I would know anything about that! Or collect Bakugans (like any 5 year old can figure out that game!) or Transformers (when they can't even see the movie) or YUGIOh/Gundam/Pokemon whatever-the-heck cards and/or action figures.  I know my kids will ask for these and I will tell them to put them on their birthday/Christmas list, then I'll choose just a few items off of said list.

But the most recent addition to his wish list was a Snuggie.  A SNUGGIE!  "It's BIG, and it's a BLANKET, and it comes with these SLIPPER SOCKS, and it's BLUE and I want one, Mom!"

ENOUGH, television advertisers.  With all due respect to adults who choose to wear Snuggies, I will not have my child traipsing around in one.  Talk about a ticket to social ostracism.  Have you seen that family in the TV ad at the football game?  They look like a bunch of cult members waiting to catch a ride on Halley's comet!  Come on!  Growing up is hard enough without saddling a kid with that sort of baggage.

Sorry son, don't even bother putting it on the wish list.  Not. Gonna. Happen.

The Best Piece Of Baby Equipment I've Ever Purchased

I'll start out by saying I'm a big believer in wearing your baby.  There is nothing like having a little one snuggled up against you when you're going about your day.  Both of my children loved to nap while strapped to me.  My two-year-old still does.

I've tried every baby carrier out there.  No joke.  I know a lot of people love their wraps but I could never figure out how to put one on without it dragging on the floor (ick!).  I loved my Baby Bjorn when the babies were tiny, and my first child loved the Hippychick Hipseat (so did my back!).  Then, I found the ERGO Carrier.



You can wear your child in the front, on your hip, or on your back, it's easy to get them in and out, supports your back beautifully, is machine washable and it goes up to 50 lbs.  That's right, I sometimes still carry the 5 year old in the back position when he's pooped.  I would never think about traveling without it - no need for a stroller!

They now also sell an infant insert so you can forget all of those other carriers and just buy one.  It is vastly superior to everything else out there.  I use it every single day, multiple times a day.

Poll: Would You Install A Wind Turbine On Your Property?

I would LOVE to install a wind turbine.  We live in a fairly windy part of the country and the southern exposure of our home is too small to support a meaningful number of solar panels, so a wind turbine would be great.  But our city won't permit it primarily due to aesthetics (as far as I can tell).

Reading this article today in the New York Times made me realize that many other people might be similarly frustrated.  To get more information, I created a poll and posted it to my site - please stop by and take it.  This poll will be open for one week.

Gardening In The Rain

Turns out that gardening in the rain is really pretty fun. It's cooler, the bugs are less aggressive and it's easier to pull roots out of wet soil. Plus, the kids get to splash in the puddles and get really muddy, which is just about their favorite thing to do.

The photos below show what I accomplished this afternoon while my kids played.  Removed the overgrown, uneven and dead flowers (four large garbage bags full - MY BACK MY BACK).  Added two bags of flower bed soil and mixed it into what was already there.  Then used a watering can to spread two diluted gallons of organic liquid fertilizer.  Concluded by planting some pretty purple pansies.  A few of the liriape didn't survive the summer and will need to be replaced, but this bed is looking a lot better now.

Before

After

I also cleaned out two other flower beds and prepped them for new flowers.  One of them was full of lovely worms.  The other?  Grubs.  Many, many grubs.  Need to think about what to do there.  I've read that they are not necessarily detrimental, consuming dead organic matter and aerating the soil, that only 1 out of 10 grubs might be a problem.   We'll see.

TechnoMeg: How To Add A Favicon To Your Blog

Do you see the tiny flower on the EcoMeg tab and address bar of your browser, above?  As you might have already surmised, it's my logo.

In this teeny tiny (16x16) form it is called a FAVICON ("favorite icon").  It adds a bit of flair and professionalism (wait, do those to together?) to your website.

Note: to add a favicon you will need to modify your HTML code in Blogger.  It is always a good idea to save a copy of your code before you make any modifications.  To do this: from the Blogger Dashboard, click Settings, Basic, Blog Tools, Export Blog, and save a copy.

Now, here is how I made my favicon:

1. Chose my image.
2. Uploaded it to www.Photobucket.com
3. Resized it to 16x16 (click edit, then resize, then enter 16x16, save)

How I affixed it to my EcoMeg tab and the browser address bar:

1. Still in Photobucket, looking at your flavicon, click Share, then More Options, then Get Link Code.
2. Copy the Direct Link for Layout Pages (the URL in that pale yellow box, below) and paste that URL into the following code:
   
   
   
   

   <link rel="icon" href="favicon.ico" type="image/x-icon" />

   <link rel="shortcut icon" href="favicon.ico" type="image/x-icon" />

   <link rel="shortcut icon" href="YOUR FAVICON IMAGE URL HERE" />

    <link rel="icon" href="YOUR FAVICON IMAGE URL HERE" />

   
   
3. From your Blogger Dashboard, click Layout, then Edit HTML.  Find the following line of code and paste the code from #2 right above it:    </head>
4. Click "PREVIEW" to see how it looks.  If your Favicon is there, click SAVE TEMPLATE and you're done.

Notes: a) You can also build a favicon and enjoy free hosting of it at ICONJ.  b) Examine the head section of your html to see if blogger has embedded its own favicon - if it has, you can substitute the url for your own favicon. 

TechnoMeg: How To Add A "Grab My Button" Image/Box

These things seem all the rage (see mine below and in my left column).  I'm not sure who would want mine but it's fun to have one and they are easy to create.



<br/><center><a href="http://www.ecomeg.com"><img src="http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae214/ecomeg/yaCLHW.jpg"/></a></center><br/>

From your Blogger Dashboard, click Layout, then Add A Gadget. Choose HTML/JavaScript.  Type your title (e.g., GRAB MY BUTTON!).  In the Content box below, paste the following code and modify it for your blog as indicated.  (Note: I've found http://www.photobucket.com to be a good host for my online images - a good image size for this is 100x100)

<center><img src="YOUR IMAGE URL HERE"/></center>

<center><textarea rows="5" cols="20" wrap="hard"><br/><center><a href="YOUR BLOG URL HERE"><img src="YOUR IMAGE URL HERE"/></a></center><br/></textarea><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span></span></center>

(PS - For those of you who want to post similar how-to's through your Blogger blog, you will notice that you cannot simply paste your HTML/JavaScript code into a widget and have it post as regular text.  I used a super site called Postable to overcome this obstacle.  Many thanks to Tips-o-Tricks for pointing Postable out to me!)

TechnoMeg: How To Post An RSS Feed Of One Blogger Label

Highlight a particular label in your blog by giving it its own box, just like I did for my TechnoMeg label (see the left column on my blog, top box). 

I found this PIPE by Ro Zanchetta.  Just input the label name, your blog's URL and the number of posts you want displayed.  Click RUN PIPE.  Then click GET RSS FEED and copy the URL of the RSS Feed.  To add this to your Blogger blog, from your Blogger Dashboard, click Layout, Add a Gadget, scroll down the Basics until you find the FEED gadget.  Paste the URL into that gadget. 

Voila!

TechnoMeg: Adding An Amazon Store To Your Blogger Blog

Adding an Amazon Store to your website is an easy way to earn commissions off of the sale of products you highly recommend.  The best part of it is that you don't have to handle the order-taking, fulfillment, shipping, billing or returns - Amazon does that for you. 

You choose what products appear in your store.  You can add products as links on your blog, a link to a standalone site or in a widget box so shoppers don't feel like they are leaving your website to do their shopping.  You can also choose to add a category banner.

This is what a aStore can look like (this is my aStore).

Just set up an account with Amazon.com Associates and follow the instructions.

Introducing: TechnoMeg

Let me introduce a new label on my blog: TechnoMeg (completely tongue in cheek here, folks).  Blog posts with this label will detail how I built my Blogger blog.  You will have the benefit of reading about the solutions I found without having to listen to the many expletives I muttered while working on them.

If you have any questions about these posts, I am happy to answer them.  Just leave comments and I will do my best to promptly reply.

LOTS of Gardening This Weekend

It's that time of year.  Time to switch out some seasonal color.  Time to spread more organic fertilizer on the lawn.  Time to replace some plants that didn't make it through the summer's heat.  Time to feed the trees and shrubs.  Am even thinking of doing ryegrass this year.  But that will have to wait until October, when it's more reliably cool.

A big obstacle to my ambitious day?  We had a huge thunderstorm last night and it's still drizzling today.  Might need to wait until tomorrow to do the spreading on the lawn and the feeding of the trees and shrubs.  But I think I can do the planting today.  Let's see if I can psych the kids up to play in the rain!

Photos later!

Freeze That Bread!

I've blogged before about the beauty of a freezer.  But this morning I was reminded how great it is to freeze bread.  I used to throw away so much stale, moldy bread, but I haven't done that in ages.  We use every slice.  Now THAT is a green idea.

AWARDS

This One Lovely Blog Award was kindly given to me by Jael Custom Designs.

This Best Blog Award was generously given to me by Jenny at Southern Institute for Domestic Arts and Crafts.

 

This Over The Top award was given to me by Pat at Mom's Best Bets.

How To Neatly Remove An Avocado Pit

 I LOVE avocados.  I don't say that casually.  I love them in the same way that I love watermelon or pumpkin pie - I could eat avocado at every meal.

Avocados taste great on salads, burgers, sandwiches, as guacamole, on burritos, with tomato and a light dijon vinaigrette, with a slice of tomato on a bagel, plain with salt and pepper, you name it.  And I am doing my best to encourage the same passion in my children (with success!).

Up until this year, however, I did not know how to neatly remove the pit.  I mangled it every single time.  My brother's mother-in-law introduced me to the proper way to remove a pit.  Tap it with a sharp knife, twist and voila! Out pops the pit.

So the next time you buy one of those lovely $2 organic avocados you can wow your family with a non-mangled presentation - even a neat little avocado fan - see a video on YouTube to find out how.

A Fun And Tasty Project For A Sunday Afternoon

It's a holiday weekend and we were looking for something fun to do. We also wanted dessert after dinner tonight. A nice marriage of the two objectives: decorating cupcakes!

I used Pamela's chocolate cake mix, which is the most delicious cake mix I've ever found, and iced them with Pamela's vanilla frosting mix. After the cupcakes cooled, I let the kids loose on them with every colored sugar and jimmy in the house. The result was gorgeous and delicious, and the kids had a blast. And only half of the sugar landed on the floor - which is a vast improvement over the last time we did this!

Yum! Happy holiday everyone!

Daily Photo: Crosswalk to Nowhere

Anyone who has gone for a run with a jog stroller can tell you the frustration of busy roads with no sidewalks. This is what I faced today while trying to run to the grocery store with an overtired-so-oh-thank-goodness-now-sleeping toddler. Had to push the stroller through the grass, bumping and jostling as I went, at times lifting the back or front to keep my passenger from waking up.

How desperate am I for exercise that I would choose THIS to do? VERY. My non-napping toddler is going through the adorable but schedule-busting "mommy mommy carry me carry carry carry!" stage, making exercising at home virtually impossible.

"We Will Miss You Juan" - How Do You Talk To A Child About Death?

Yesterday, as I drove to pick up my five-year-old from school, I saw a large electronic sign that had been parked by the side of the road to his school - the kind of sign the city uses to announce road work. It read, "WE WILL MISS YOU JUAN." I wondered who Juan might be and why the city was using its resources to post a message like that. Maybe someone special in the public works department?

On the return trip with my son, a massive funeral procession passed us (strangely, the second I'd seen in two days). At the front were two motorcycle cops, followed by a fire engine, more police cars, city vehicles, and then maybe 200 more cars. The scene was so striking that I immediately knew this was someone very special. Everyone on both sides of the 4 lane road pulled over and respectfully waited as the procession went by. The casket was in the back of a pickup truck with four brawny men sitting on each side of it - pallbearers, I guessed. I'd never seen a casket transported like that.

My son asked why we had stopped and what was going on on the other side of the road. I could have glossed over it, but I thought I might be able to lightly delve into the topic (I have to at SOME point). A lump in my throat, I pointed to the motorcycle cops and the approaching fire engine with the long line of headlights following it and told him, "it's a funeral procession - the largest I've ever seen."

I went on, "when someone dies, everyone who loved that person comes together to celebrate the person and say goodbye - that's what a funeral is. When the funeral is over, everyone follows the casket to the cemetery. They say prayers and then put the casket in the ground. This must have been someone very special, loved by many many people."

"That's sad," my son said. "Yes, very sad," I said, "maybe it was a firefighter, since there's a fire engine at the front of the line. Maybe the firefighter died saving people."

I went on to explain that every living thing dies one day - bugs, flowers, animals and people too. "I don't want to die, Mom!" Gulp! I said, "no, no, humans live a very very long time, sometimes 100 years if they eat right, get rest, exercise and keep learning. You are only 5 years old - you could live another 95 years! That is a very long time. Don't you worry about that." I then talked a little about heaven, that people who die go there and are very happy there with God. Thankfully, he seemed satisfied. Treacherous waters safely navigated - for now.

Traffic began to move again and we approached the intersection where the electronic sign was still flashing. I said to my son, "you know, I think his name was Juan. There's a sign there saying WE WILL MISS YOU JUAN - I'll bet that is for him. Wow, he was really loved. I wish we knew him - he would have been a wonderful person to know."

"Mom, I'm glad we know his name now. I wanted to know his name."

"Mom, will I have so many people there?" "Of course," I said, "at least as many. You are a wonderful boy and you will be a wonderful man. Many many people will love you very much in your life, as much as we love you now."

"Mom, if I forget, will you tell me his name again?" My throat caught a bit, "of course."

When is the perfect time to discuss death with a child and how do you go about it? I guess it would not be great to discuss it for the first time right after someone close to the child dies. I hope I made the right decision.