I borrowed that title from one of my favorite children's books,
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. I'm being dramatic. Obviously, I am completely blessed and have no reason in the world to complain. At all. But sometimes a person just gets frustrated and has to let it out. Mind if I dump on you? Thanks!
So, my toddler work up at 5:30 a.m. for the third day in a row and refused to go back to bed. So I was up at 5:30 a.m. for the third day in a row. I am not a morning person. "Get me another juice!" "I don't want a fresh diaper!" "But I want to put my foot on your belly!" "Get me that toy!" "I don't want that toy! Get me another toy!" "I don't want to read that book!" "I don't want to get down!" "I don't want to be quiet!"
As soon as the 5 year old woke up at 7 a.m., they proceeded to play every dangerous game known to man. Example: "The Big Jump Game." This involves climbing up the jungle gym we have in our playroom and jumping off of the highest point. My toddler is two and broke his leg in a playground accident last January. Needless to say, I am unenthusiastic about this game.
My 5 year old asked for porridge for breakfast two times, so I made porridge with raisins, honey and bananas (yum!). While both of them insisted on "helping" (code for spilling everything, trying to pull things out of the refrigerator, running over my toes with a scooter, and climbing up on the counter every five seconds).
Once it was on the table, the 5 year old crossed his arms over his chest and insisted he wanted something else. I finally resorted to telling the story of the hungry children in Africa. He still refused to eat it.
"Husband!!!" I yelled. It was 8:45 a.m. by now, and I'd been up since 5:30 a.m. while he slept peacefully. It was time for him to take over. Seriously. Right then. That very second. Grumbling, he obliged.
I finally realized that the 5 year old probably just needed a solid cuddle, so I scooped him up, reminded him how much I love him and that we'd simply had a hard morning. This worked and he ate his porridge.
Then the toddler ran out of the bathroom without his diaper. Thankfully, it was only #1. He decided he wanted to wear big boy underpants (we keep a drawer of them in the bathroom in case the spirit moves him to potty train).
I sat down at the table with a cup of coffee and started to poke around my blog, catch up on some other blogs. This was the first time I'd sat down all morning. "Mommy, get me that!" "Mommy, this toy needs a new battery!" The two kids began to tease each other and soon the toddler was shouting at the 5 year old. I looked at my husband.
It is now 10:45 a.m. and I am sitting on the floor of the bathroom with my lap top, door locked. I have put my husband in charge. The toddler is yelling "Mom! Mom! Mom!" outside the door. I am waiting for my husband to tell me the toddler had a pee pee accident.
Sigh.
I'm sure plenty of Moms have similar mornings. Even in Australia.